This image beautifully depicts A STATE I have during the coaching session.
I will try to describe in words how I feel this state when I am a Coach, having my Client by my side.
The main state is that of CONFIDENCE:
- Confidence in my client, that he/she has absolutely everything he/she needs to be balanced, fulfilled and happy (knows at the deepest level what he/she wants and have the resources to get where he/she wants to be);
- Confidence in myself, that I will know how to be useful and be there for him/her exactly when and exactly as much as he/she needs, no more;
- Confidence in the coaching process, that it will guide our interaction in the right direction for my client.
- Confidence in the energy between us, which will be a catalyst in my client’s development.
- Confidence in the Universe, that everything around us and all life situations occur at the right time and that every situation arises to teach us something; Confidence that everything will be okay in the end.
RECIPROCITY
For me, the coaching relationship is about reciprocity.
It is a relationship of total trust and openness, a serene and warm relationship.
In the coaching relationship, the discussion partners discover themselves. They look at a situation from previously unexplored angles.
Using metaphors, using humour, all the inner discovery is done as if it were child’s play.
Often children’s play is challenging…they develop all the capacities they need through play, but development always happens out of their comfort zone!
INTIMACY
The intimacy created, the recreation and relaxation within that relationship – lifts the protective barriers we have built up throughout our lives and usually wear as shields.
We allow ourselves to be authentic, vulnerable, yet confident in our powers.
When I enter into a coaching relationship with a new client, I feel free of any bias or preconceived ideas about what is right or wrong, fair or unfair, true or false, beautiful or ugly.
The client will enter into a relationship with his/her own concepts of good, truth, beauty, and in the process will discover and expand his/her mental map with other truths and points of view. At the same time, I also expand my mental map with each interaction.
ACCEPTANCE
Acceptance of everything that happens is something that defines me as a Coach. Accepting all points of view, accepting the client’s pace, accepting the client’s resistance. (This acceptance implies no attachment to my own values, beliefs, and approaches in the coaching process).
CURIOSITY
Curiosity is another element that is part of the Coach-Client relationship.
My curiosity is about discovering who the special and unique person in front of me is.
The client’s curiosity is about discovering something in himself that he has not seen before:
- by revealing blind spots;
- by revealing an unconscious dynamic (through the systemic approach in coaching);
- by uncovering behavioural patterns and replacing them with a conscious and client-friendly way of acting;
ATTENTION
My attention will be fully focused on my client! I will be present with all my senses and my whole being in the coaching process.
I listen more than I talk.
I ask more than I answer.
I feel more than I think.
I empower and liberate.
I, the Coach, feel my role is to bring inspiration where there seems to be insufficient motivation and to lead towards harmony where things seem out of balance.
